FFF #5

Lily is getting more and more independent as each day passes. She wants to do everything herself. I do it I do it is her most used piece of vacabulary. when it comes to PJ's she is no different. She must pick out the appropriate wear (the bottoms must be shorts to show her knees. She says like daddy. Daddy needs to start wearing dresses because mommy misses her little one in dresses.) and then she must dress herself until she gives in and says help with things like buttons. This picture is not of Lily in PJ's but it is just after her bath when we were trying to pick out our evening outfit. The doll is Lucy. Daddy and Lily picked Lucy out together last friday. Lucy has been everywhere with us since. Lily is putting Lucy nite nite. Then she layed down with Lucy and we covered her up and told her nite nite. She promptly sat up crying and saying no nite nite. I guess night night is not to be joked about quite yet. It took us awhile to convince her that we were just helping Lucy go night night and it wasn't bedtime yet. The picture of Lily and Daddy is just because we are definetly a daddy's girl right now.

There's a baby in there

So I am starting to show. Well really I look like I have had a little too much pizza but I know it's baby in there. I am going to highjack Lily's blog once a month to show my progress. This pregnancy is still not a reality. I have never taken a positive pregnancy test that led to a baby so this is a new reality to me. I think when I can feel the baby move that it will become a reality. In many ways it feels like the beginning of Lily's adoption before we got the pictures of her sweet face. It was just this fantasy we liked to talk about. She remained a fantasy until she was placed in my arms. The ultrasound pictures feel much like the update pictures we received of Lily. Not as cute but I am on this euphoric high when I see that little beating heart just like when Lil's face would appear on my computer screen and then we would go back to our daily lives and the talk of our baby would seem unreal again. I think many women feel this way even if they haven't had trouble getting pregnant. My body just doesn't feel that different.

We have chosen a name if it is a boy. We can only agree on a boy name if he is a she she may go nameless. Alexander Elias is our name for a boy. Alexander is Peter's middle name and a name he really likes. When we were first trying to start a family he always suggested A but I always vetoed it because it was too common. I had to be Sarah K. most of my life in school and despised it so I wanted a defferent experience for my children. 5 years later I like the sound of it and Lily and Alex go really well together so Alex it is.

I must admit I despise this picture so next month it will be more flattering but here is my baby bump. Can you use that term if you are not famous?

FFF #4

Here it is one of my favs. This is Lily and her cousin Ava. You can't beat cousin love.

FFF #3 and some news!

So I have been keeping a secret for the last few months and I got the okay to share my news. I am pregnant 12 weeks to be exact. I am dumbfounded and amazed that there is actually a little being growing inside of me. Especially because I am not supposed to do this. No fertility drugs no special visits to the doctor just a miracle. I must admit that my reaction to the news that Lilyana would be a big sis was strange. I felt as if I was betraying her or that I was somehow making her more of an adopted child. I feel like now we kind of hide behind a cloak of anonoumity. No one asks us any questions anymore. I feel like brining a biological child into our family is just going to make things harder for Lily. As I have time to get used to this idea I have come to the realization that a sibling is merely a blessing for my girl and that she is going to have to deal with the issues of her adoption whether we have a biological child or not. It was just my heart wanting to protect her. Wanting her not to have to realize that with all of the joy of adoption that there will also be pain and lastly that I have my own issues to deal with.

That being said I had an ultrasound on thursday and the baby looked like a baby no longer a little shrimp. It was the cutest little thing and it even sucked it's thumb! I walked out of the office balling. The first time I let myself feel a connection to this little being. The doctor graduated me to a normal pregnant girl status. Which is a double edge sword because that means I will also get ultrasounds like a normal pregnant person. No more peeking inside my womb every other week.

FFF #2

I thought as I went to look through our extensive catalog of pictures that there would not be many pictures of me and my sassafrass. Simply because I am usually the one behind the camera. However I am happy to report that there were lots of pictures of Lily and I. So in honor of mothers day here are pictures of my cuddle bug and I in no particular order. If you would like to join the fun and see other favorite foto friday posts check out the link at the side of the blog called Kiss the frog for me.

She did it!

Lily was in our friend Nick and Elana's wedding on Saturday. It was an exauhsting day. She only had an hour nap and the wedding was 3 hours away. Mommy and Lily were very tired by the end of the day, but I have to start giving my girl more credit, because I truly thought there is no way she was going to walk down the aisle and she amazed me once again. She even threw the petals from her basket. She did have another flower girl to copy and a ample supply of jelly beans to coax her. So from now on I am not going to underestimate my girl or the power of the jelly bean :)













On a side note just something I must vent about. I had someone make a comment to me at the wedding about how their children don't eat sweets as they looked at my girls ample supply of jelly beans. I told him it was a special day and she was a special girl. What I should have said was keep your opinions to yourself. This same person told my husband when we started the adoption process my husband should just get a mail order bride it would be cheaper. So, as you can imagine I do not like him too much and try to avoid contact as all costs! He says he doesn't understand why his comment offended me so. There are some people that are not worth my time or explanation!

FF Day #2

Forever family day #2. Here is exactly what we were doing 2 years ago at this time. I don't have much time but wanted to repost our forever family slide show.